From the archive: I miss you

Well, I miss you -you're gone and you will not return.

I miss those years that today I only remember in black and white. Those years, in which my hair was free and curly.

Times when having thirteen was not enough to call it life. Times when crying and laughing was little, times when having a thousand and one reasons to open your eyes every morning was usual, times when taking a deep breath and face the world was a daily adventure.

I wish I could feel again that adrenaline when facing the unknown. Today I feel nothing but dread when something not familiar comes close to me.

I long the solitude I had, it was so mine. It was so fresh and so rebellious. I long that feeling of clumsy self-sufficiency –now I only lie under my cowardly dependence.

I miss those days full of nothing -there was always something new to experience. The was always a rule to break.

I wish I could lock in my room and get lost in the regression of my memories, so far in those days when my eyes were not tired of being wrong. I wish my heart could be like in those days, when the cold didn’t bother me.

There was life around me, the light in every detail, the magic in every being. There are now only shadows, fears and a fuzzy entity that claiming to be me.

Well, I miss you, I miss you, Sharon.